Do you want to be healed?

John 5:1-15

“Do you want to be healed?”  Jesus asked the invalid by the pool called Bethesda.  He was waiting and watching the water among all the paralyzed, blind and lame; each one wanted to be first into the pool when the waters were stirred up.  Usually crowds of sick and hurting people clamored around Jesus.  Yet, here in a space full of invalids, there is no mention of a commotion.  Did anyone see the Healer walk in?  Wasn’t there anyone who recognized him?  What was it about this one man that caught Jesus’ attention?  Was he the only one who looked up when Jesus arrived?

 Jesus knew the man had been there for thirty-eight years.  And He who always asked the right questions and gave the right answers asked this, “Do you want to be healed?”  But the man did not answer directly.  Jesus questioned the heart of the man, and the man responded by pointing out all the circumstances and people preventing his healing.  “Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me.”  So, Jesus replies, “Get up, take up your bed, and walk.”  The man was healed.  He took up his bed, and he walked.

But, it was the Sabbath.  When the religious leaders saw this invalid walking around with his mat, they went to work enforcing the laws against work on the Sabbath.  They informed him that he should not be walking around carrying a mat.  It was against the law.  (Don’t you know people like that?  They did not even comment on the fact that this man was walking after 38 years!)  Then, instead of rejoicing because he can move, the man insists that it is not his fault that he is carrying his mat.  The man who healed him TOLD him to carry it.  Who was he?  The man didn’t know. 

Jesus found the man later and said, “See, you are well!  Sin no more, that nothing worse may happen to you.” (That’s the way you talk to a pessimist.  Because, let’s face it, something worse could always happen!)  Jesus was speaking this man’s language.  He wanted this man to see.  Really see.  He is well!  Sin no more.  This man could be transformed; his life could be forever changed.  Instead, he walked away and told the religious leaders that it was Jesus who healed him.  He tattled. And the leaders had one more reason to hate Jesus.

This story bothers me.  If Jesus came and asked me if I wanted to be healed, I would not have missed Jesus’ question or turned aside the opportunity to be transformed.  I would not have missed Jesus, focusing instead on the circumstances and people surrounding me.  As a main character in the story, this man is really disappointing.   I would have done better.

What did you want the man to do?  What did I want the man to do?  I wanted him to really answer the question, to see how much he needed you, Jesus!  I wanted him to say ‘Yes, I want to be healed!’  I wanted him to stop thinking about everything and everyone around him, about who was at fault and who to impress.  I wanted him to follow you out of the temple and listen to your teaching.  I wanted him to spend time with you!  If he had spent time with you, he would have been changed. 

 Do you want to be healed?  Yes, Lord.  But I give you so many excuses.  Help me not to make excuses.  I want to be healed.  I need to be transformed.  Come, spend time with me.

Empty Jar, Thirsty People, Living Water

John 4

Jesus and his disciples set out for Galilee.  Tired and thirsty after traveling a long way, Jesus sat down at Jacob’s well.  He was in the middle of Samaria.  When traveling between Judah and Galilee, the route through Samaria was usually the shortest.  But Jews and Samaritans despised each other, and no Jew would have wanted to spend too much time there.  Samaria was a lost cause.  In fact, strict Jews would travel across the Jordan River and walk all the way around it.  This way they would avoid being defiled by associating with Samaritans.  But Jesus was not concerned about travel time or direct routes.  He walked to Samaria because he had a divine appointment with thirsty people at an old well.

I wonder about the Samaritan woman who walked to the well that day.  What began the downward spiral she was on?  She had lost or divorced five husbands.  In a culture which afforded women so few choices, I don’t believe that she had control over every negative event in her life.  Still, her current living arrangement, with a man who was not her husband, would be enough to cast her out of respectable society.  Now she found herself traveling to an out-of-the-way well at a less than ideal time of day.   Did she suffer under a general stigma that something was wrong with her?  Was she scorned because she was immoral, or was she avoided because she was mean?  She walked alone with her empty pot, hoping to find the well deserted.  Did she hurt?  Was she numb?  Was she bitter?  Did her heart sink when she saw Jesus sitting there?

It didn’t matter.  Jesus was compelled to meet this unacceptable and expendable woman.  She was so thirsty for something good in her life, something that might last!  Jesus began the conversation with a request, “Give me a drink.”  The woman did not respond politely at all.  “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” She bitterly pointed to reasons Jesus should not have even asked.  Men and women did not generally converse together in public, for one thing, and Jews and Samaritans did not share dishes or much else. According to the Jewish cultural standards, Jesus would be defiled if he drank water from her jug.  The woman must have wondered what rock Jesus had been hiding under. How could he not know this?  But Jesus knew it was this woman who was hiding, struggling under the weight of her broken life.  She should be asking him for a drink.

Jesus said, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.”   The woman’s attitude changed slightly.  Was it all she would have done differently, if she had only known?  Was it simply that living water sounded so wonderful and good?  She called Jesus ‘Sir’ as she asked her next question, “Where do you get that living water?” Surely not from this stagnant well.  Jesus had nothing to draw with, and the well was deep.  “Are you greater than our father, Jacob?” This man’s words sounded too good to be true.  But, Jesus went on. He even promised, drink my living water and you will never thirst again!  This empty, thirsty woman knew what it was to be out.  She was out of water, out of friends, out of place, and out of love.  She said, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not be thirsty or have to come here to draw water.”  That would be one less thing she would be out of, and according to this man, one thing in her life that would last.  Imagine, a lifetime supply of fresh water!  But, Jesus doesn’t want to fill empty water jars, he came here to the well to fill empty people.

Jesus’ next words put this woman face to face with her life. “Go, call your husband,” he said.    But she had no husband.  The men in her life had come and gone, and the man she was with now was not her husband. Many who study this passage say that at this point, the woman changes the subject.  But I don’t think she did.  This stranger has just reviewed her life in a few short sentences.  She realized that Jesus may be a prophet with some real answers!  So the woman asked him, where should we worship?  At a time when God revealed himself in specific places, through set traditions, specific people and circumstances, she must have wondered,   where is God?  How can I make things right with Him if He is not here, but in Jerusalem?  How can I get to Him if I am barred from the place He is? With each decision, each heartbreaking turn of her life, it probably seemed that He was increasingly out of her reach.  Jesus did not scold her for changing the subject; he answered her question.  In fact, after gently reminding her that salvation does come from the Jews, He gave her a great promise, “But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him.”

Imagine the Samaritan’s new found hope!  She had searched for just a glimpse of Him. But, no longer would she be separated from the God whom she so desperately needed!  No longer would she stand alone at the base of a sacred mountain, by a deserted well dug long ago.  No longer would she be unable to enter the sanctuary of God!  God had sought her out.   This man said the time is now here!  She would be able to worship Him!  Could this man be the gift of God?  Could he be the Messiah?  Could he be her Savior?  “I am he,” Jesus said!

Running all the way back to town, this woman was not thirsty for anything, except that others share the joy which now overflowed in her heart.  She shouted to those who, for so long, met her with silence and disdain.  She sought out those who had turned away, those she had hurt, and those who hurt her.  “Come!  See a man who has told me everything I have ever done!” (That turned some heads, sharply, I imagine!)  “This man, he couldn’t be the Messiah, could he?”  The people in town followed her back to the well for a few reasons: curiosity (what HAD this woman done, exactly?) to prove her wrong, (No. Of course he is not the Messiah!) and damage control (did he say anything about….?).  What a brilliant woman.  She knew human nature.  She knew how to get people to move!

Back at the well, Jesus was too excited to eat!  He had just seen one woman’s life change, one woman who believed.  He was tired; now he is energized!  When he looked up to see the thirsty Samaritan crowds coming, he must have felt such joy!   The Jews rejected Samaria for good reasons, but Jesus took his time there.  No person or community is beyond his reach.  All who are hopeless, take heart!  Jesus came to restore what was rejected, rebuild what was broken, and graft in what has been cut off.  The dead are raised to life in Jesus.  Hope is not only for those who can be salvaged, those who have potential, or those who have not hurt us.  Life is given to those who are dead!  Living water flows not only in pre-existing river beds, but across deserts and down rocky mountainsides!  It even springs up through deep and stagnant wells.

“Whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” –John 4:15

Change of Heart?

John 3:1-17

He was righteous.  He had authority and influence. He impacted culture with his teaching and decisions. He could silence his fellow leaders with a simple question.  People listened to him.  As Nicodemus walked to meet Jesus one night, I wonder what he expected.  Was Nicodemus prepared to listen?  

We don’t have to go too far to see why this man inspired respect.  Jesus had recently driven the money-changers and those who sold animals for sacrifice out of the temple.  He upset the normal and perfectly acceptable way the temple ran, the system supported and maintained by religious leaders just like Nicodemus.  This powerful man was part of what Jesus saw as the problem.  But Nicodemus doesn’t immediately reject Jesus or put him on the enemies list.  He doesn’t quickly decide that Jesus is a fraud.  No, Nicodemus wants to hear more before making his decision. So, instead of plotting, he starts walking.  He sets out to talk personally to Jesus.

They sit down, and he respectfully gets to the point.  He says, ‘Rabbi, look, we know that you are a teacher. We know you came from God, because no one can do the signs you do.’ Jesus was a good teacher, and maybe he was a prophet.  But, that is where Nicodemus stops.  That is all he is comfortable with.  And I think there is an unasked question hanging in the air between them.  Who does Jesus think he is?  If he is from God, why did he disrupt the temple and drive people out with a whip?  Whose team is Jesus on?  Prophets called people back to God.  Jesus just drove people out of God’s temple!  Why?

I love where Jesus starts, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born from above, he cannot see the kingdom of God.”  It is impossible to recognize what you need if you do not think that you are in need.  And Jesus knows that Nicodemus needs to see himself as he really is:  A dead man in need of new birth.  But Nicodemus doesn’t see himself that way.  So he misses the pun.  Instead of hearing “born from above,” Nicodemus hears “born again.”  (Why would he need to be born from above?  Those who were “born from above” or “born of God” were converting to the Jewish faith. He is already a Jew.  He is a Jew’s Jew.)  Jesus must mean being physically born again, but that didn’t make sense either.  Nicodemus fails to understand what Jesus is saying because he fails to see himself as spiritually dead.

So Jesus brings up Moses and the bronze snake in the wilderness (Numbers 21:4-9).  Back in the wilderness, Moses had received the Ten Commandments, the instructions for the tabernacle and the sacrificial system that the LORD put into place. Instructions for purification had been explained, including the need to be cleansed with water if an Israelite came into contact with a dead person. (It is interesting to read Numbers 19, Ezekiel, 36:25-27 and Heb10:22 with John 3:5.) But when the Israelites complain against God and Moses, no sacrifice or ritual is named that can make it right.  Instead, a bronze snake is lifted up.  All who are afflicted with the deadly plague, which was a result of their complaining, must look at the snake and be saved.  Sacrifices were in place for all sorts of wrong-doings.  But wrong attitudes, wrong hearts, what was there in place for those?  Jesus doesn’t lay it all out there for very many people as plainly and completely as he laid it out for Nicodemus that night. He says, “As Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life.” 

What could change the heart? The tabernacle, the temple, the vessels set aside to hold water for purification, the sacrificial system, they were not enough.  All pointed forward to Jesus Christ and upward to a restored relationship with God through His Son.  Because of Jesus, purification jars were filled with the finest of wine. Jars cannot purify, Jesus can.  Because of Jesus, the temple courts were emptied with zeal, and the fullness of the gospel was told to a Pharisee who was full of questions and reservations. Because of Jesus access to God is personal and direct.  Because of Jesus, sin is washed away, dead hearts believe, and lives are filled with the Spirit of God.  Because of Jesus, whoever believes in him may have eternal life!  Did Nicodemus see the truth in Jesus’ words? Did he realize his own need for salvation, despite the fact that he was a really good person? Do you?

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.  For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” John 3:16-17 

New Wine

John 2:1-11

“They have no wine.”

I love reading a familiar passage in Scripture and finding something new.  I see the story from a different angle, ponder words I had previously skipped over, and I learn lessons I missed before.   Sometimes I realize that I will never get to the bottom of a passage, there will always be something more to understand.  John 2:1-11 is one of those places.

Jesus and his disciples went to a wedding.  Now, weddings were a really big deal; invitations went out to as many people as possible.  This groom was obligated to make sure that enough wine was provided to last through the whole wedding celebration.  The master of the feast was charged with managing the supply so that it would not run out.  But it did.  The groom was unable to meet his obligation.  He did not have enough.  He was facing public disgrace, and it appears, he didn’t even know it. 

The Bible is so true to life, and here we have a great example.  How often can everyone else see that we are face to face with disaster?  We plan and prepare, thinking we’ve ‘got this,’ but still find that we are utterly unable to meet our obligations.  We are easily blinded to the gaping deficits in our own lives.

But this is what I love.  In John 2:3, we read that Mary saw the problem.  She knew her son well enough to know that somehow, he would help.   She went to Jesus. “They have no wine,” she said.   Oh, how I must learn from Mary’s example not to criticize or stand back when something or someone is lacking.  How I must learn to go straight to Jesus.  Did Mary expect a miracle?  Did she expect that Jesus would finance the purchase of additional wine?  The text does not say.  But it is clear that she knew he would not stand back.  He would know what to do, and he would help.

Wine is a significant symbol.  Hundreds of years earlier, the Old Testament prophets told of a Day when there would be plenty of new wine.  The old struggles would pass away and the new would come.  (Joel 2:24; 3:18; Amos 9:13; Jeremiah 31:10-14).  A few short years after this wedding, Jesus will use wine to remind us that our salvation comes through his blood that was spilled for us. Wine is the sign of a new covenant, new joy, new abundant life and blessing, bought with great pain and sacrifice. 

On this particular wedding day, wine was the need.  “They have no wine.” Jesus looked around and saw six very large jars used for the Jewish rites of purification.  The jars were not full, so Jesus asked that they be filled with water.  All six.  The servants filled them to the brim.  Following instructions, they drew some out to take to the master of the feast.  It was wine.  It was better than what they had started with.  They had a great abundance of new wine! 

The disciples saw and believed.  They knew what the prophets had said.  They knew what new wine meant.   Surely this man, who could turn need into abundance so easily would be the One to make right everything they saw wrong in the world.  Surely He was the Messiah!  The servants must have believed.  Who turns water into 180 gallons of wine, anyway?  Jesus.  Only Jesus.  Who He Was had everything to do with what He did with the water in those jars.  At that wedding feast, what they had was not enough.   They needed something more.  Only Jesus could meet their current need so completely and abundantly.

When I read this passage, my heart cries out, Lord Jesus, what I have is not enough!  I have no more wine!  However pure my traditions are, no matter how I plan, it is not enough.  But you are the One who was promised, the One who fulfilled, the One who was poured out and emptied, the Fullness of His Glory who reigns at the Father’s right hand.  You have enough.  You meet my need.  You bring forgiveness, life and joy to the full.  You sustain my life in every way.  You turn emptiness into abundance.  You make all things new! 

“This is the first of his signs, Jesus did at Cana in Galilee, and manifested his glory.  And his disciples believed in him.”  John 2:11

A Lens Adjustment

Sometimes doctors give you good news. This doctor’s appointment was not without good news.  In fact, it was without bad news.  But I had trouble focusing on that because of the Other News the doctor gave us.  Healing would come, he thought, with a little work, a little change and a little patience.  I didn't want a little work or change. I didn't want a follow-up appointment six weeks from now.  I just wanted this to be fixed.  So, even though there wasn't any bad news or expensive news, I left the office thinking only of the Other News: a little work, a little change and a follow-up appointment.

Be careful what you focus on. 

“Philip found Nathanael and said to him, ‘We have found him of whom Moses in the Law and also the prophets wrote, Jesus of Nazareth the son of Joseph.’ Nathanael said to him, ‘Can anything good come out of Nazareth?’  Philip said to him, ‘Come and see.’ Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him and said of him, ‘Behold, an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no deceit!’  Nathanael said to him, ‘How do you know me?’ Jesus answered him, ‘Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you.’ Nathanael answered him, ‘Rabbi, you are the Son of God!  You are the King of Israel!’  Jesus answered him, “Because I said to you, ‘I saw you under the fig tree,’ do you believe?  You will see greater things than these.’ And he said to him, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, you will see heaven opened, and the angels of God ascending and descending on the Son of Man.’   John 1:45-51

Some of us see the glass half-empty.  I am one of those.  I focus in on details which signal things probably won’t end well and should be different.  So, when Philip informs Nathanael that he found the Messiah and then invites him to meet him, I identify with Nathanael’s response.  ‘Can anything good come out of Nazareth?’  He is not convinced that this guy Philip is so excited about will amount to anything. Why?  He zeros in on the unlikely town of Nazareth.  I can’t blame him.  Israel had waited for the Messiah for 400 years.   Maybe Israel had strayed too far.  Maybe hope was out of reach.  The present didn't look good and the future didn't look better.  Nazareth?  No.  Maybe Help would not come.

But Nathanael follows Philip to Jesus anyway.  He probably thought of Nazareth the whole trip, listing all the reasons why it was the wrong place for anyone significant to be from.  Philip should have realized this.  Maybe Nathanael is even rehearsing his “I told you so” as they walk.  How could someone like Nathanael continue to hope?  Then, Jesus calls out to him as they arrive.  And Nathaniel asks, “How do you know me?” Jesus says that he has seen him underneath the fig tree.  He knows what went on there.  No one else knew.   And Nathanael believes! 

But, Jesus questions, “Because I said to you, ‘I saw you wonder the fig tree,’ do you believe?  You will see greater things than these….Truly, truly, I say to you, you will see heaven opened and the angels of God ascending and descending on the Son of Man.’”  After all the coming, seeing, telling, following and believing that has happened since Jesus came on the scene, why is He not completely satisfied with Nathanael’s belief? 

This was the passage.  This was the question I pondered on the day of the doctor’s appointment.  As I drove home, still grumpy about the Other News, I thought about Nathanael and Jesus some more.

Nathanael zeroed in on the amazing truth that he was known by Jesus as he could be known and understood by no other.  That is something to rejoice over!  But Jesus knew that Nathanael needed even more.  He needed a Savior, a Way to Life with God. So, Jesus refers back to Israel’s beginnings.  He zooms out and reaches far back in history.  He says, Nathanael, I know you.  Yes, that is important.  But don’t stop there.  Keep watching.  Like Jacob, you will see the heavens opened!  I am the Way to restoring the relationship with God that was lost.

Be careful what you focus on.

 Have I been looking through my zoom lens for too long? Is it possible that, when focusing solely on the presence or absence of small miracles and provisions in life, I run the risk of thinking God too small or relying on faith that is too weak?

Jesus knows our every thought and sees our smallest, most secret needs.  But Jesus invites me to look beyond those.  I am saved to Life beyond circumstances, Life with Jesus.  Not only does He know me, but I can know Him.  Making my way home, I decided.  I cannot do it myself, so I looked up asked Jesus to re-adjust my lens.

 ‘Lord, what do You want me to focus on?’  You will see greater things than these.  

It's About the Tomatoes

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control..."
                                     Galatians 5:22, 23

Today I uprooted my favorite tomato plant ever.  It is November, and winter really is around the corner.  The time had come to cut the plant down.  I took my time, more time than I imagine a real gardener would.  First, I picked all the tomatoes that had ripened, despite chilly temperatures.  I was surprised at how many big, beautiful cherry tomatoes there were.  Then, I began clipping vines.  I worked in small sections, discovering hidden ripe tomatoes, tossing away empty vines, and carefully saving green tomatoes.  (They will sit in the garage and continue to ripen.)

As I slowly made my way through the bush, I noticed that the best tomatoes came from vines tangled up in the small tree that the plant had grown into.  The tree seemed to sigh in relief each time I clipped and carefully disengaged a vine from its slender branches.  It was more than ready to see the plant go.  I uncovered the tomato cage which had proved inadequate.  I discovered morning glory pervasively trying to choke the plant.  But ripe tomatoes tangled into the weed, regardless.   I rediscovered sprinklers, and worn out flowers that had been covered up with tomato vines for months.  And I continued to work.

As much as I love this silly plant, I realized that my concern was not for the vines, but for the fruit.  I did not preserve any of the leaves, vines or roots, but I cared very much about saving the tomatoes.  The tomatoes were important.  My plant seemed to know this.  Tomatoes grew everywhere, in the midst of weeds, along the ground in the dirt, in the middle of the tomato cage, and all the way up the vines through the tree.  They grew regardless of their surroundings.  The vine was created to produce tomatoes, and it did. 

The Hebrew word “glory” means “to add weight to.”  The Greek word means to “give praise and honor.” I have been thinking about what “glory” looks like in my Christian life all week.  And I don’t have a firm handle on it.  Still, something struck a chord as I lifted heavy clusters of tomatoes out of the tree.  Maybe glorifying God has to do with living as I was designed to live and doing what I am called to do, regardless of my surroundings and circumstances or potential distractions.  Could I glorify God simply by producing the fruit He is growing me to produce? And not just a little fruit, but a lot of fruit.  Consistent fruit.  I am put on this earth to glorify God.  It is not about my happiness, my comfort, my agenda, or my contributions to the world.  If I were a plant, I would be a Glorify God Plant.  And I would need to produce Glory To God Fruit.  My tomato plant knew…and I believe my tree knows, too…it’s all about the fruit.

"By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples.  As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you.  Abide in my love."
                    John 15:8-9

This Tomato Plant

 I am not successful in growing much .  But, now I have grown a tomato plant that produces tomatoes I actually enjoy!  It is a huge triumph among endless gardening failures.   I have never had another plant like it. I have never had a plant that lived so long!   The vines have grown over and out of the tomato cage, climbing all the way up to the top of a tree growing close by.  They wrap around the tree branches and loop around the trunk.  Tomatoes hang heavy from tree limbs, which now sag lower than they should.  I’m sure the tree is stressed out by the presence of this new garden pest.  And the flowers and bushes probably feel the same.  My dear tomato plant has moved and spread out in all the wrong places, over the tops of flowers, in spite of weeds, and regardless of anything else in its path.  It sure can grow, but I am sorry to say, it is not pretty. It’s a mess.

Last week, a light frost covered the grass.  I decided that I really should work on pulling that tomato plant out of my “garden”.  But I needed to pick the ripe tomatoes first.  As I picked, my resolve to pull up the plant weakened.  Didn't the weather man say it would be warmer next week?  Maybe it’s too early to pull it up.  Maybe I could just give it a really good trim.  I worked for a long time, picking, trimming, untangling vines from tree branches.  The more I worked on it, the more problems I saw.  This plant is a wreck.  It’s wrecking my flowers and my tree!  It looks terrible.  But I love it.  I dearly love it.  Why?  Because I planted it.  And it grew.  And there are yummy tomatoes.

I identify with my imperfect, unorganized plant.  Like it, I am unable to even appear as if I have everything together.  Like it, I am a tangled mess.  I thought about this as I worked, wondering if my imperfect life was producing as many “tomatoes” as this plant is.  It might not be doing everything perfectly, but it sure is doing what it was planted to do…producing tomatoes!  

I love you like you love this plant.

 I felt that message loud and clear as the Lord spoke to my soul. 

 I see your imperfections, your short-comings, your over-reaching, your accomplishments, disappointments, all that is unfinished, and what is yet to come. You may not be perfect, but even imperfect plants can produce tomatoes.   I love you because I planted you.  I made you.  You are mine. 

The tomato plant didn't get pulled up last week.  God lifted up my discouraged heart, instead.

It turns out, the weather man was right.  It has warmed up again.  My tomato plant is much the same.   New tomatoes ripen every day.  I need to trim it.  It is still too big.  The tree is still stressed out.  The  plant looks like a giant obnoxious weed.  But now, the thought of uprooting it makes me sad.  Whenever I look at it, I see myself, a tangled mess who wishes so much to somehow keep growing in Christ. And I remember that God loves me.  He loves me like I love my plant.  Mess and all.

"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you.  Abide in my love."
John 15:9

Start at the Beginning...Skip to the End

John 1:1-18 and John 21:1-22

I never skip prologues, prefaces or introductions when I read a book.  I also read epilogues, afterwards, postscripts, and bibliographies with great interest. The book of John contains my favorite prologue, as well as the most thought-provoking epilogue I have ever read.  As I read John and organized it into a general chart, I saw that there are just four major sections in the book, including a prologue and an epilogue.  I have the book of John printed out, double spaced with wide margins.   This helps me read the book with fresh eyes, and it gives me the freedom to scribble all over the packet.  If my notes begin to bother me, I can re-print the page.  If I see that I have written something brilliant, I can transfer that note over to my Bible.  The first page of John has torn off my stapled packet.  (I hope I don’t lose it.)  Recently, it landed beside the page containing chapter 21.  It gave me an idea: What would it be like to read the prologue and then skip straight to the epilogue? 

Prologues provide important information and back-story so that the reader better understands the narrative to come.  The eighteen verses of this prologue are brilliantly written. Need context?  Clarity?  The big picture?  Here it is!  John carefully crafts his thoughts to communicate theological truths that are foundations to faith.  In just eighteen verses, he covers the trinity, the incarnation, creation, salvation, the covenants and more.  John, who wrote with the purpose of helping us to believe, tells us immediately the truth about Jesus.  As a result of reading the prologue, we know all the way through John’s gospel what we are invited to believe in. 

Fast-forward to the Epilogue in John chapter 21.  Epilogues are written to show us what happened to the characters after the main story concludes.  I find myself reading this one again and again, pondering the scene, the breakfast, the disciples at the campfire, Peter walking along with Jesus and John following behind.  As broad as the prologue is, with epic themes and timeless scope, this epilogue is narrow.   Here we zero in on a few men, a single meal, and a short conversation on the beach.  While John’s prologue outlines what we need to believe, the epilogue gives us insight into our new life in Christ.

 “But these are written so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name,” John 20:31.  What does life with Jesus look like?  It is not without some uncertainty.  The disciples didn't have all the answers right away.  It took time to recognize that Jesus was even on the scene as they looked toward Him in the early dawn light.  Real life is like that.  Things are not always clear at first. Life with Jesus is full of provision and invitation.  Jesus invited them to “Come and have breakfast.”  No one said, “No, I need to get these fish over to the market.”  They all sat down with Jesus to enjoy his presence and provision for them.  Life with Jesus is full of forgiveness, restoration and love.  Peter might have thought himself outside Jesus’ inner circle of trusted friends after denying him.  Instead, he finds himself in a heart-to-heart conversation with his Savior.  It is this forgiveness, this love, this complete restoration of relationship with God that causes us to love in return.  (Remember, the prologue says, “We have received grace upon grace from the fullness of Jesus Christ. “) Jesus asked Peter, “Do you love me?”  And because of Jesus, Peter answered, “Yes!”   Life with Jesus means following Jesus.  “Follow me,” Jesus said.  No matter the cost.  The love that Jesus pours out on us, the fullness of his grace, the life-giving truth, his unfailing mercy and his divine glory compel us.  How can we NOT follow Him?  We won’t be able to help it!  It will be as natural as it was for John to rise from his spot at the campfire and follow Jesus as he spoke to Peter.  But, will we follow Jesus wherever He leads? 

Peter says it.  The question we all ask.   He hears the call, but slows his step to turn his head and look at John. “What about him?”  Will he have the same experience I will?  We have all asked it.  Will he have the same pain, joy, mission, impact, circumstance, challenge, success, failure, rejection, disappointment, loss, gain, talent, favor, opposition, contentment, frustration, stuff, relationships, that I have?  That I lack? Oh, how we have been there.  How we have asked and wondered and known better than to ask, but couldn't help but wonder anyway….So Jesus narrows the scene even further.  Now Peter no longer sees the disciples or smells the fire or hears the water.  Now he looks away from John and turns his head toward the One who called him ‘Child’.  It is just Jesus and Peter now.  And Jesus says, “You, Follow Me!”  

In the prologue, I see The One True God.  Three In One, The Creator, The Word, The Only Son who came to save us.  And in the epilogue I find myself eye to eye with Jesus alone. I hear him extend an unbelievable invitation!  How is it that we could follow one so great?  And yet, we can!  Jesus comes to each of us and extends his personal invitation of forgiveness, fellowship, and purpose.  He asks us to believe and have life! Follow Me! How will you respond?

 “In him was life, and the life was the light of men.  The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it….To all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God…. From his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace….No one has ever seen God; the only God, who is at the Father’s side, he has made him known.”  “You, follow me!”

Believe and Live

John 1-21

Need something to believe in?  Read the Gospel of John.  Read it more than once.  Read it straight through, cover to cover.  In it, I find Jesus.  He reveals Himself to any who would recognize His signs and listen to his testimony.  Those who looked at Him and asked “Is he it?” got their answer.  Jesus is the Son of God!  John finds this to be of first importance.   The pages of his Gospel are filled with this message: Believe and live. 

Who is the Son of God?  He is the I Am.  He is the bread of life, the light of the world, the door of the sheep, the good shepherd, the resurrection and the life, the way, the truth and the life, the true vine!  My soul is hungry and I cannot satisfy it.  I need Jesus!  Life is dark.  I cannot find my way and I have no hope.  I need Jesus!  I cannot get past my sin.  I need Jesus!  I need someone to care for me. I need Jesus!  I am dead inside.  I need Jesus!  Nothing sustains me.  I need Jesus!  John shares the truth that Jesus is not just anyone, He is the only One uniquely able to save.  He is the Only One uniquely able to give life to every man, woman and child who will believe.

 Jesus does not leave us to wonder what new life looks like.  John records Jesus’ words to the disciples just before he is handed over to the authorities, the final words and prayer he wants all believers to remember.  Jesus spoke to them about love.  God loves each one of us to the end.  We are to love one another. 

Life is complicated.  It is easy overlook what is essential.  John saw that, perhaps, in his own day.  He writes with laser-beam focus.  He records signs that we may see, testimony that we may hear, and he bears witness that we may believe.  Jesus is the Son of God!  Believe and have life!  What will that life look like?  It will be filled with love.  I cannot wait to dive in to John and study the book more closely, because after reading John with a broad lens, looking for major themes and the big picture, I find myself wrestling with these questions that reach the core of who I am.  What do I really believe about Jesus?  Am I taking hold of the gift of life I have been given?  Do I love with the love the Son of God himself has shown to me?  Or have I lost sight of the essential?


What is my Bible open to right now?  The Gospel of John. I will read it again, studying it section by section, writing down questions and looking for answers. I hope you will have your Bibles open, too!  

I Repeat...

Psalm 18 and 2 Samuel 22

“For it is you who light my lamp;

  The LORD my God lightens my darkness.

For by you I can run against a troop,

And by my God I can leap over a wall.”

-Psalm 18:28-29

 In life, I find myself repeating things.  It is not enough to say “I love you” only once.  (Too often, it is not enough to say “Clean your room” only once!)  If I want what I say to be remembered, I find that repetition helps.   When I find something repeated in the Bible, I sit up straighter and read more carefully, because God must really want to drive his point home.  When I discovered that Psalm 18 is almost identical to David’s song found in 2 Samuel 22, I thought “this must be important!” They are.  These songs are amazing!

2 Samuel 22 is David’s personal song of praise for God’s deliverance in his life, and then he adapted the song to be used in public worship, which is how we find it in the Psalter.  Both songs are found in the scriptures—not just one of them.  Pondering this, I see how important it is to stop and personally praise God for his faithfulness in my life…when no one else is watching.  This personal song, found in 2 Samuel 22, is no short thank you note jotted on the back of a note card.  No.  I realize that I need to stop for a while and allow my heart to sing God’s praises!  In Psalm 18, David shared his experience by adapting his song so that it might be used in public worship.  I'm so glad he did!  I wonder how many have read these verses and found strength, hope and encouragement through his testimony of God’s faithfulness. 

What promise I find in this psalm!  The LORD my God lightens my darkness.   When my heart is sad and dark, when I don’t see what is ahead and cannot make sense of what is around me, I whisper, “I need a lamp, Lord!”  It is He who is my lamp. Only He can give me hope!  When I come to a wall in my life, an obstacle I can’t fathom scaling, I can trust that with God by my side, in His strength, I can leap over anything. 

We would not be encouraged by this at all if our God was weak, if he was unwise, if he was not good.  But David takes the time to remind us, vividly, that our God is Almighty and All-Wise.  He is Good!  Two times, in 2 Samuel 22 and Psalm 18,  God calls out to us in the pages of His Word.  Let us sit up straight and hear His Almighty, All-loving Voice!  Whatever danger you encounter, whatever difficulty you face, in whatever hopelessness you are entangled, however desperate your prayer, I HEAR!  I RESPOND!  I RESCUE!

Heavenly Father,

            Please, light my lamp!  My way is dark.   I cannot see you.  Help me remember who you are.     I am in need!  I call to you for help and look to you for deliverance.   There is a wall.  Help me scale it!  You are my Answer.  I love you, O LORD, my strength!

“This God—his way is perfect,

The word of the LORD proves true;

He is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.”

Psalm 18:30

The Name I Trust

And those who know your name put their trust in you,

for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you.

-Psalm 9:10 ESV

Names are important in the Bible.  Parents did not just name their children according to what name they thought sounded nice.  They often gave their children names that revealed something about the child’s family, future, personality, or the circumstances in which they lived.  Names defined a person.  In this verse, God asks me the question: Do you know my name?  I know that with questions like this, God calls me deeper; he wants to show me something more.  So I dive in. 

God is called by many names in the Bible.  Books and Bible studies have been written on the names of God, so it is a big subject.  But I know if I look, I will see something important about God and who He is, just through studying His Name.   I found a list of the Names of God in the back of my Thompson Chain Reference Bible.  I carefully read through the list and prayerfully considered what to do next.  Do you know my name?  I decide to start with the name God gave when introducing Himself to Moses: Yahweh, or Jehovah.  I AM.  

I go back to Exodus 3 and I find Moses standing barefoot before the bush which is on fire, but will not burn up.  God is speaking to him, giving him a life-changing mission to go back to Egypt and free the Israelites from slavery.  Moses has some questions.  He does not immediately accept the assignment.  He has questions.  He asks God for a name.  Who should he say sent him?  “I AM WHO I AM,” God says.  “Tell them, ‘I AM has sent me to you’” (Exodus 3:14).

I read the definitions for Yahweh slowly, over and over again, soaking them in.  I AM.  Life-giver.  Performer of His promises.  The One who Is.  The Absolute and Unchangeable One.  He who is It ^1. I imagine that as Moses stood there before the fire, surprised by the meeting he found himself in, he remembered what had happened in Egypt, and he worried about what could happen if he went back.  Yet, as he wrestled with the past and worried about the future, God brought him back to the present, declaring,” I AM!”  Moses needed to know that God is Real and Present.  God met that need in revealing His Name.  I AM. 

What is my deepest need right now?  Is it a need for faith?  Forgiveness?  Material provision?  Relationships?  Healing?  Freedom?  Purpose?  It is hard to know; I need so much!  I ask so many questions, I crave so many answers.  I worry about so much that is lacking and seek so many different kinds of provision.  I search and search….  But, YOU, LORD,  are my deepest need.  YOU are my Need and my Answer.  I put my trust in You.  You are I AM.  Life-giver, The One who Is.  The Absolute and Unchangeable One.  Performer of His Promises.  He Who is It.

Heavenly Father,

            Thank you for being the Great I AM.  Thank you for ruling over every circumstance, and for breathing life into each new day.  Help me to trust you with every need, and to follow You down each path You invite me to take.  You are the God who sees.  You are the God who provides.  You are It.  You are The One who Is, my Answer and my greatest need.  Help me to seek You first, trusting you to care for all the details of my days, and to see me through the greatest heartaches and triumphs in my life. 

‘Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him;

I will protect him, because he knows my name.

When he calls out to me, I will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble;

I will rescue him and honor him.

With long life I will satisfy him

and show him my salvation.’

Psalm 91:14-16

1     From Brown-Driver-Briggs (Click to open)

Weeping and Trusting

Psalm 6 and 7

 “I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.”              -Psalm 7:17 (NIV84)

 To begin my quiet times, I like to read from a devotional book.  I don’t stick to one; I have a few that I choose from.  The short devotionals help me to get ready and focused on listening to what God has to say to me.  Today I chose Streams in the Desert by L.B.Cowman.  She had the excellent habit of writing down things she heard or read that she wanted to remember, and that is what the book is…the collection of her most treasured spiritual finds.  They come from great books, ministers and missionaries of and before her time.  Today I read what George Mattheson wrote about waiting for hope.  “Even when my joy is gone, give me the strength to stand victoriously in the darkest night and say, ‘To my heavenly Father, the sun still shines.’  I will have reached the point of greatest strength once I have learned to wait for hope” (288).

After my devotional reading, I read Psalm 6.  It is not a cheerful David who pins this one. I went on and read Psalm 7. David is crying out to God for deliverance!   I am now pondering the questions, “What do these Psalms tell me about God and about my relationship with Him?”  Reading Psalm 6 and 7 again, I find that I can be honest and real with God.  My songs and prayers to Him do not always have to be happy; I can trust Him and weep at the same time.  These Psalms show me that when life gets difficult and sorrow comes, my faith in God must not falter (as is often the case when we experience pain.)  God is Good.   He will be the last thing standing when all else fails.  He stands with us when life falls apart.  He shields us when we are left defenseless. We can trust and wait for His mercy, knowing that He hears and accepts our prayers.  Even when we do not see answers, we know that He has them, and that they are right.  When we have nothing on earth to be thankful for, we can still give thanks because of His righteousness.  When there is no one left to sing to and nothing more to sing about, we can follow David’s example and sing to the LORD Most High.

Heavenly Father,

Help me to run to you when I need protection, justice, help and comfort.  Help me not to walk slowly to you, after I have tried other ideas, people, or avenues.  Help me RUN to you.  You continually show me that you are Enough.  Help my life to prove that wonderful truth over and over, just like the hymn says,

“'Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,

And to take him at his word;

Just to rest upon his promise,

And to know, "Thus saith the Lord."

              

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust him!

 How I've proved him o'er and o'er!

Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!

O for grace to trust him more!”

Cowman, L.B. Streams in the Desert. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1997. Print. 

 Stead, Louisa M.R. “Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus” 1882.

Walk, Stand, Sit, or Grow

 Psalm 1

Today, I’m looking at Psalm 1.  I read the whole Psalm a few times, but the first three verses really stand out for me.

“Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked,

or stand in the way of sinners

or sit in the seat of mockers.
 (NIV84)

I was thinking about the phrase “walk in the counsel of the wicked”.  What could it look like today to walk in the counsel of the wicked?  This phrase addresses how decisions could be made and courses charted in life. Am I living a life that is culturally acceptable, or am I living a life that glorifies God?   “10 Steps to a New You” in a magazine looks so much more interesting than reading my Bible and spending time in prayer.  However, my choices need to be made prayerfully, based on God’s wisdom.  I should not chart my course according to self-help advice or socially acceptable “norms.”

What really stuck with me all day was the next phrase: “stand in the way of sinners”.   When I stand still, I don’t make any progress.  It is the lack of progress that is really bothering me as I think about this.  I thought about my habits; I stand in them day in, day out.  Some habits are totally acceptable to the world, but not to God, the “that’s just the way I am” habits, and the “I have trouble with that” habits.  Why is it that bad habits are so hard to break, and good habits are so hard to establish?  What kind of habits and attitudes am I standing in?

Notice the next phrase!  “Sit in the seat of mockers.” Isn't that the truth?  Scornful people, mockers, they seem to be on the sidelines of life.  They are always watching, and their mouths are always ready to throw those verbal darts which often hit the mark with more accuracy and force than we let on.  But today, I thought of how mockers get there, onto the sidelines.  Is it that they have lost hope?  The psalmist says “out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.”  Painful words spill from pain-filled hearts sometimes.

But…

(Here comes the good part!)

His delight is on the law of the LORD,

And on his law he meditates day and night.

I love that.  And I have to say, the more I read the Bible, the more delightful it is.  Meditation, here, is not about emptying one’s mind, but filling it up…with scripture.  It is not hard to meditate on scripture.  All you have to do is think about it.  But I find it is easier to ponder a verse or passage all day if I am personally studying it. Why?  Because I have more to wonder about, consider and work through when I’m studying a verse or passage.  I must figure out what it says, what it means, and how it can work in my life.  There is simply more for my brain to do.  It is hard for me to meditate on the passage my pastor preached on last Sunday.  I can’t always remember what he said.  (I hope he is not reading this.  However, he might agree with my point.)  If you are personally engaged in studying your Bible, it is easier to mediate on a verse or paragraph.  Meditation also happens when you are memorizing verses.  So, if you want to mediate day and night, start studying or memorizing a verse!

Bible Study makes a difference. God reveals Himself to us in his Word.  It is He who brings about real and lasting change in our lives.  He is the One who can guide our paths, break our long-standing bad habits and establish new life in us.  It is He who can give us hope that will endure through any circumstance.  He can forgive and heal and restore us to experience real joy.  Instead of inertia, we can sit at the feet of Jesus and learn from His Word, we can stand on the promises of God and walk in the light of His path.  We can grow and yield good fruit in season, because, as the Bible tells us, God has set us free, through Jesus Christ!

Father, 
Thank you for your Word.  It is so powerful and effective.  You are able to reach and change parts of me that otherwise could not be changed.  Help me not to stand still in my walk with You.  Help me to feel so uncomfortable in my bad habits and attitudes, that I will abandon them, for Your sake and with Your Divine help.  Plant me in Your Word, in Your Stream, so that I might yield Your fruit in Your season, for Your Glory.
Amen.

“Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked

  or stand in the way of sinners

  or sit in the seat of mockers.

But his delight is in the law of the LORD,

  and on his law he meditates day and night.

He is like a tree planted by streams of water,

 which yields its fruit in season

And whose leaf does not wither.

Whatever he does prospers."

Psalm 1:1-3 (NIV84)

Refuge

Psalm 1-41

Refuge.  It is not the most frequent word found in Psalm 1-41.  However, it is the word that I am left with after reading that beautiful section of scripture straight through.  In fact, I've been pondering it for weeks now.  Once when I was a kid, we were surprised by a big thunderstorm while camping.  My mom, dad, brother and I were in the camper when we heard a knock.  I will never forget the sight of my soaked grandparents standing out in the rain, after their tent had been badly damaged in the storm.  They needed refuge!  We laughed and played games that night, waiting for the storm to pass.  As I read Psalms, I wonder if I really do take refuge in the LORD.  Could Hebe inviting me to something deeper that the Psalmist understood?  When storms come, where do I take refuge?

 Once again, the concordance proves to be the best place to start finding answers to my questions!  I pulled it up, typed in the word "refuge," and read every verse in Psalms where it is found.  I discovered that the word “refuge” is connected to God in each of the 44 times it appears throughout the whole book.  What does it mean to take refuge in God? 

Using an online Hebrew Interlinear Bible, I found that the Hebrew word for “refuge” almost always used in Psalms 1-41 (which the King James Version translates as "trust") is the word chasah.  It’s a verb.   What would it be like to use ‘refuge’ as a verb?  I’ve always thought of refuge as a place, not an act.  Places are fixed locations.  But an act can be done in lots of different places and conditions.  Thinking about refuge as a verb really changes things.  I know very little about Hebrew, but I notice that the interlinear Bible translates the word chasah into English as “take.” And, as my concordance search revealed, it is always connected to God.  Take God.   I have turned this information over and over in my head for a few weeks. (It is so easy to meditate on scripture when you are trying to understand it.) 

Take God.  God is so much more real than I can comprehend.  David knew.  God is not only able to provide what I need, but he is able to give Himself and fill my need.  What an invitation!  God is here, for the taking.  His salvation, strength, wisdom, hope, help, healing…. Take!  Blessed are those who take.  I thought of my soggy grandparents.  What if they had run somewhere else in the storm?  What if they had chosen to stay in their damaged tent?  Sometimes the hard thing to do is to get up and run for cover in the LORD.  Sometimes I run the other way because it seems to be the easier option.  Don’t take something else.  It won’t be enough.  When nothing else is left, when nothing else is right, when nothing else is within reach, take God.  David knew the pain of great loss, he knew what it was to flee for his life, and he knew the value of personal safety and security.  He Took God.  He Refuged.  And from his Refuge, he Rejoiced!

“ The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;

 my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.”

--Psalm 18:2a